Tuesday, September 18, 2012

MEPs and a nasal dilemma.

So all good things, must have a great beginning.

I was accepted!  So now what?

The endless sea of paperwork, that's what.

I have come to understand that the acceptance into the JAG Corp is the easy part.

I have signed so many papers, been poked and prodded by so many people, made to jump so many hoops, and I still feel lost.  I have a law degree for christ's sake!

MEPS was a whole new experience.

I was asked to show up at 5:30, only to be yelled at by a surly man upon my arrival that I was 30 minutes late.  When he ascertained that I was going to be an officer his response was "oh, that explains it".  hmmmmm

I was put in a room with a ton of 18-19 y/os who sat around me giggling at what the medical exam was going to entail.  (yes, there was some spreading of butt cheeks, and a woefully inadequate but very humiliating paper towel dress)

I will say, it was a cattle call at its finest.  I shuffled from station to station where my ears were checked, eyesight was examined, blood was drawn, and crevices were inquired after.

The worst part was at one point, my fellow girls and I were ushered into a room, told to strip to our undies and bras and had to go through a complex (or not so complex) series of exercises designed to show off our excellent motor capabilities and joint function. 

I just want to say that I am a CHAMP at the duck walk.  I waddled my way around that room, and left those young girls in the dust.  I would also like to stress, if you know you're going to have to strip down to your skivvies, wear the nice stuff.

At the end of the day (10 hours later), I had a paper in hand saying that I was fit for duty.

The only thing that upset me about the whole process was my nose.

For those of you that weren't keeping up with my nose drama, let me fill you in.....

Sometime around March or so, I was out jogging and ran by some guys with those heavy duty mowers.  I doing what I do best, inhaled "something".  It resulted in an inch long gash in my nasal cavity and eventually full blown staph.  Little did I know.  I was oblivious to this for about 2 months, just thought I was having extra nose bleeding due to the changing of the weather, no big deal right? Wrong.

2 rounds of heavy duty antibiotics and thrice daily swappings of "nose goop" over 2 months later, I was finally on the way to healing.  But I was TERRIFIED of being denied admittance to the military as a result of this.  I know people that have been turned away for braces on their teeth.  So I jumped through all the hoops, got all the medical records and disclosed everything about it.

Fast forward to MEPs.  They saw my nose issue on my records.  I was bounced around and talked to at least 5 different doctors all up in arms about the condition of my nose, etc etc.  In the end the head doctor at the office decided it was alright and certified me.

It wasn't until I was in my car and driving back to Huntsville that it hit me like a lightning bolt.

NOT ONE SINGLE DOCTOR EVER GOT OUT A SCOPE AND ACTUALLY LOOKED UP MY NOSE.  Not one!  They were so concerned about it, yet no one actually looked at it!


But I guess it's something that I have to look forward to in the years to come.

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